#5: on making an impact, taking criticism, and excitement for February

So first of all, I apologize for not updating this as much as I've wanted to.. I would say it's because I don't have time, but honestly it's just laziness. I don't know why writing a blog seems like such a daunting task, but somehow I end up putting it off for way too long. Anyway, here goes.

The first bible study (or, as they call it, "charla"- a conversation) was last Monday (told you I've been putting this off for a while..) and actually went pretty well. The topic was La Mujer Perfecta (the perfect woman) and how that is defined by culture, by us, and by God. There were 8 or 9 girls there, which was nice.. we talked about what it means to be beautiful and also about inner beauty, which was great. I feel like that's something that as a young woman growing up in the church, I heard a lot about, but that these girls have not encountered much of yet. It was a joy to bring that message to them. One of the girls, whose name I can't recall (she doesn't live in the project- Yomara invited her, which was great) was very shy during most of the talk. She was a bit chubby and I could tell she was self-conscious, and especially looked uncomfortable while we were talking about our cultural perceptions of beauty. But then when we got to the part about what God sees as beautiful, I read 1 Samuel 16:7.. "The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." (excuse the gender exclusivity..) As soon as I read this, I looked up and saw that same girl just light up- grinning from ear to ear. That made my day.

The second charla went pretty well.. it was supposed to happen a week later at the same time, but when Monday at 9 rolled around this week, Regan and I got to the project and no one was there. A few girls showed up around 9:30, so we waited... and waited.. and waited. This was expected, as the week before we had waited until about 10:30 for all of the girls to show up. So we waited.. until 11. and 11:30. and finally just decided to do it the next day at 10. But on Tuesday, the same thing happened... we got there, and just waited and waited. Granted, the Nicaraguan sense of time is way different than it is in the States.. they're not used to having to be on time for things, and schedules and appointments are not part of their culture like they are in ours. But it was still very frustrating to make the 2 hour trek out to the project two days in a row, and both times, wait around for hours for something you had prepared for.

So I talked to Omar, who happened to be at the project on Tuesday, and he and I talked to Calin, one of the leaders of the Chacocente community. He agreed to talk to the families of the girls in that age group, since that's something we neglected to do initially, and tell them about the importance of this meeting as well as the times each week. Thank God for that.. I really didn't know what to do.

Anyway, so on Wednesday (yesterday) we had our second session. This week's theme was choices, and made the point that what separates a girl from a woman is her capacity to make wise decisions. It went well.. just wish I'd prepared more. This seems to happen a lot with stuff like this- I prepare what looks like a lot, but then the whole thing ends up taking like 15 minutes and then I feel dumb. Pretty much that's what happened today. And the worst part was that at the end, when I was tying it into the Bible and how God guides us to make the right decisions if we can listen well (Isaiah 30:21) and Madeline (yep, same name as me, and same age) asked me a very good question- are we really making the decision, or is God? I was happy she was thinking about these things but embarrassed to not be able to answer her as well as I would have liked to. If this had been in English, I would have tried to delve deeper into that discussion and explore the intricacies of the issue of free will vs. God's will.. but it is SO MUCH HARDER in Spanish. Not to whine or anything.. but I just have a hard time being spontaneous in Spanish so far, which is frustrating.

Also frustrating at times can be taking criticism here.. I've learned that a lot of the social boundaries and awkwardnesses that exist in the States simply don't here.. people (especially kids) are very open about making personal comments about your belly fat or how boring your bible study was. (and yes, one girl did make that comment.) At least Madeline explained some things I could do to make it more interesting- more interactive activities, explaining things more thoroughly, etc. I'm so grateful to have her there as an older participant to help me along.

On a more exciting note, I finally had the chance to talk with Omar and Xavier (the school director) about the classes I'll be teaching. It turns out that I'll just be teaching music, which will be great.. seven 45-minute classes (one for each grade K-6) two days a week. The other two or three days during the week, I'll be helping Omar with delegations and the sponsorship program, where the kids exchange letters with their sponsor families in the States. (I get to pick a day off, and I'm thinking about Wednesdays.. that way, if I teach Tuesdays and Thursdays, my weeks can be symmetrical. AWESOME.)

I'm really excited to start teaching in the first week of February, but I hope I can find some way to prepare well.. there is absolutely no curriculum or structure or anything, which is a bit frustrating, but hopefully I can figure something out. If any of you music teachers out there have any good suggestions/curriculums for teaching General Music to elementary schoolers, that would be greatly appreciated. If there are any books or materials that you think would be helpful, let me know and my parents can probably bring them down when they come February 11th.

Which brings me to my next bit of exciting news! I'm so pumped for my parents to come down and visit for a week and a half.. for the first few days it's just them, but on the 15th, Ted Anderson's group from Western NY is bringing a group down to work in Chacocente. It will be so fun to have my parents here.. I'm really excited to show them what I've been up to here, and hopefully do some fun things in the area while they're here. And then in March, my brother's coming down for a week while he's off from college.. we've got some pretty sweet day trips lined up for that week as well. Should be awesome. I miss my family a lot but I'm glad they'll have a chance to experience things down here and spend some time with me.

Anyway, that's enough rambling for now. I hope this finds you all well and enjoying the cold (for most of you, anyway.) The weather has been "cold" here.. in the 70s or maybe high of 80 for the past few days.. and cloudy. People have literally been wearing pants and sweatshirts and complaining of the cold. Clearly they have never experienced Central New York, even in the summer...

paz y amor,
Maddie